Real Life Matters: Week Three

It could be rising

Or it could be setting

In week two Michigan State held lowly Florida Atlantic Western Orthopedic State Poly Tech University to a single first down, which came late in the game. God only knows what amount of shit the defensive back incurred from his teammates for allowing that one Firster. The fightin' Owls! had one play of more than 8 yards (0-10 on 3rd downs, 48 total yards), and it was that first down.

I expected nothing less from the Bulldogs when they played the Coastal Carolina Mascot Came from a Chaucer's Fables. The Chanticleers managed 112 yards of offense, but for a Dawg faithful that can only watch the game at a bar at 9 A.M. if he's lucky, I was not hinging hopes on anything but a shutout.

Despite playing three quarterbacks and getting even the backup waterboy some glory time, the dogs delivered. If you follow this Blog and, more importantly, the Bulldogs, you nod your head when I say you fully expect Georgia to give up a few meaningless touchdowns. You couldn't blame them if they did, with unproven and un-played pups taking the field to prove their mettle.

But there's something else going on here. UGA could've, by some objective opinions should've, beat SouthKackaLackie 'tween the hedges. Win, and you're in the driver's seat with a Miss Daisy schedule in the SEC East. The Dawgs lost but anyone watching that game will say: 1) UGA played their asses off and, 2) That was a most memorable game to watch.

So what's unique?

These players want Richt. They see a real leader that - and this is no bullshit - they would love to stand behind when they win The Big One. They don't want anyone else. They want to play for this man. Take it from the leader of UGA's team Aaron Murray (#2 in quarterback rating in the SEC, behind only "Tyler Bray," who's played Montana, Cincinnati and [HUGE dropoff in rating] Florida for Tennessee): "We are playing for wins right now. Wins equal him staying."

This week at Ole Miss, Georgia opened at -5 points. The line is now -10 and yours truly will take that (see below) to the bank feeling better about not receiving a kick in the ass. What does that tell you? Degenerate, always-betting sports gamblers move the lines. These people are, at best, 60% right, but that 10% is enough to scare Vegas into moving the line FIVE points in four days. Georgia could've just played their asses off for their CoachMR, at home and been hyped by the crowed. Hell, a few gimme scores by the Chauncer's Fables and I may be on that wagon.

I've been watching football long enough to know when I see something special, and this team has it. All of Dawg Nation will tell you we've always had the talent and the feeling we could always push it to the edge (also known as, Playing Down or Up to Our Opponent Sydnrom), but there's something ephemeral encompassing this season that can’t be will be explained here. Take the +10.

On to the week's bets. To recap, the rules are:

LOSER - Swift kick in the ass. No bullshit. Velocity of kick dependent upon kicker (kick-ee likely to ask for more)

WINNER - Bottle of his choosing.

BONUS - Winning Percentage more than 10% differential? Georgia home game football ticket

As always, it gets interesting as the season wheres on. Is it time to double down? Maybe a swift kick in the nuts (wearing 5 pairs of socks?) instead of an ass kick.

SEASON
OBJ
5-3
J-Rock
3-5
Editor's Note: Tough to go 0-4 when Vandy beats Ole Miss and Duke beats Boston College. J-Rock is new to this, fellers. He doesn't yet know Rule #1 of College Football Betting clearly dictates that you never bet on middle-of-the-pack (read: all) ACC teams. Let's see if he learned his lesson.

OBJ
Georgia (-10) Over Ole Miss
The Wynn is actually taking Georgia at -9.5 for this one. Good luck Wynn! Glad to know you follow every other relic of meaningful importance by proving yourself to be obsolete. No, seriously, the Wynn was the oringinator of the Vegas you (used to wish to) see. Yes, you began the MAJOR SPECTACULAR HOLY COW WHAT AN AMAZINGLY LARGE AND EVERYTHING IS HERE I COULD POSSIBLY WANT OR NOT WANT Vegas revolution. But get with the times. If I wasn't a poor-ass blogger I'd make a killing off your lazy-ass .5 differential.

Georgia and Ole Miss OVER 54
Are you kidding me? Georgia's going to lay at least 35 on these waysist folk. C'mon Ole Miss. Give me 19 points.

Florida State (+2.5) Over Clemson
Lock of the week. Wager everything you've got. Tell you what, if this doesn't pan out I'll YouTube myself - my fiance, my own fist or some random dude punching me in the nuts. In order of discretion, of course.

J-Rock
Michigan (-10) Over San Diego State
Miami (-12.5) Over Kansas State
Oklahoma State and Texas A&M UNDER 69


QUARTER TROPHY
The WNBA Playoffs is going on right now. Did you know?

/sexist joke

The loser of this week's picks receives the honor of the Tamika Catchings Honorary MVP award. Let's see how this plays out.

$500 to YOU, if You Can Tell Me the Two Teams in t

he WNBA Finals Without Looking it Up

GEORGIA IS A GIRL
Each week we're going to bring to you what the University of Georgia football team is, metaphorically speaking. In terms of a woman you are sexually/intellectually/spiritually interested in:

Week of 9/17
Love is hate. Hate is love. The two are inseparable. The only blissfully unaware people that do not know this are those that have never been in love - IN LOVE - enough to destroy themselves for another.

Georgia went away when you thought she may pan out. You could count on her for a could times, but she seemed...shallow in a sense. Even as a Georgia graduate you felt like there was something lacking in the fuse box department. Then you come to find she went to Law School at UGA and, well, damn, maybe she changed. MAYBE SHE'S BRIGHT.

I've met a tidy sum of women who graduated cum CONGRATULATIONS from the UGA Law School. Hate to sit on the fence but this is hit or miss. This observer is inclined to think UGA truly is turning a corner and not just attending breezy school to make a dolla.'