October Handicappin'

Yeah, it really sucks that the Braves will be sitting home for the third consecutive October instead of partaking in all that playoff baseball has to offer: 8:30p.m. start times...45 seconds between pitches...baseball in sub-30 degree weather...the Red Sox and Cubs overkill...commercial breaks so long you'd think you were watching an episode of Chapelle's Show...DANE COOK. Folks may make fun of how the NBA Playoffs last almost two months (personally, I think thats the best thing about them), but seriously, if NBA games lasted 4+ hours long, I'm sure they could wrap up the whole process in less than a month like MLB does.

Sarcasm aside, there are few things more enjoyable than getting drawn into a very close baseball game in October. And, as always, if you're not a fan of a team that remains alive after today, you can simply buy interest in the playoffs by throwing cash on one of the teams that is still playing! That's where we come in....place your bets, here's Runaround Sue's best guess as to who will be standing when the Christmas decorations are blanketing every mall across America.

Note: As a Braves fan who lived through the glory years of Maddux, Glavine and Smoltz, and also saw the older versions of those squads lose at the hand of the Wood/Prior Cubs, Clemens/Oswalt Astros, and Schilling/RanJo Diamondbacks, I believe the best thing to have heading into the playoffs, particularly the divisional series, is a lethal 1-2 punch at the front of the rotation. Sure, it's not the end all be all (again, my life as a Braves fan has taught me that having a strong bullpen is also a must-have once you get to October), but if I'm putting my money down, I'm going with the horses that are capable of throwing eight scoreless any given night.

Twins (N/A)

I know they got eliminated just a few hours ago, but I will say this: Congrats to the Twins for continuing to pump out quality, playoff caliber teams on such a minuscule payroll. Congrats to the Twins for pushing the season to a 1 game playoff just a few months after trading Johan Santana 60 cents on the dollar. Seriously, look at that roster and compare it to, say, the Tigers or Yankees. Talk about bang for your buck.

White Sox (16-1)

I am a big John Danks fan. I picked him up in fantasy this year, expecting two good weeks and ended up getting a full good season. A 23-year-old lefty that can pitch deep into the game, has overpowering stuff, gets mad strikeouts and has pitched well in big games already...they don't grow on trees. He reminds me of left-handed Josh Beckett or Doc Halladay.

That said, I don't have much faith in a team that required the following situation play out in the final week of the regular season just to make the playoffs by forcing a make-up and one-game playoff:

• Manager blasts a front-end starting pitcher, challenging his ability to pitch well in meaningful games. Pitcher basically doesn't give a shit.
  
• Pitcher goes out and gives up 5 earned runs in 4 innings to the team you are battling for the division title.
• Manager, because of lack of rotation depth, decides to pitch said pitcher on 3 days rest.
  
• Pitcher gives up 7 earned runs in 4.1 innings pitched.
  

I like the experienced lineup with power. I've talked about Danks, and the bullpen is stout. But the ChiSox 1-2 is Mark Buehrle and Javier Vazquez. Case closed.

Rays (14-1)

I've been picking these guys to collapse all year, so why stop now? No playoff experience, no dominant ace, not a very strong finish...I'm just not buying it.

(One question I've always wondered...why were they named the Devil Rays in the first place instead of Stingrays? Tampa Bay Stingrays is an badass name. Who the hell had ever heard of a friggin' devil ray before that team came around? Wikipedia isn't even sure what a devil ray is. Then, when they decide to abandon that idiotic moniker, they punt on 'Stingrays' again and go with a name that just reminds me of either the worst sitcom of all time or the name of your average Tampa-area nursing home resident...too bad.)

Who knows though...look at what the Rockies did last year with about half the talent of this Rays team. Also, Joe Maddon seems to have that Les Miles crazy streak where no matter how insane he acts in interviews or how his decisions seem to defy simple logic...things just seem to go his way. He even has a trademark fashion statement akin to Miles' hat. Of course, this isn't football and there is only so much influence a manager can have over a five game series. Helluva season for these guys though.

World's oldest Weezer fan.

Brewers (12-1)

The last time these guys made the playoffs, I was 7 days old. Tampa Bay fans are spoiled by comparison. This year's Brewers have arguably the best 1-2 pitching punch in the playoffs and a very solid lineup top to bottom. Unfortunately, the longer-tenured member of that 1-2 punch is done for the playoffs, and in Game 1 the Brewers are starting "Yovanni Gallardo," who has pitched all of four innings since May and has 24 major league innings under his belt. I'm sure this will end well.

By the way, I love what the Brewers have done with CC Sabathia since acquiring him in July. They know there is no way they can re-sign him after this season, and unlike Ben Sheets (who they also probably can't re-sign), he doesn't have a significant injury history, so what do they do? They run his left arm like a Beijing whore working a 12-hour shift during the Olympics. The guy is pumping out 130+ pitch outings like its 1949 again. Good for the Brewers...it sucks they have no shot of keeping their great pitchers, but at least they're getting every last cent worth.


Phillies (9-1)

Now we start getting into the teams that can actually win this thing. This Phillies team scares me. They're going to be good for a really long time. Look at the ages of their best players: Howard (28), Utley (29), Rollins (29), Burrell (31), Victorino (28), Weryth (29), Hamels (24), Myers (27). All those guys are either in or just entering their primes. I'll enjoy hating them all for the next 7-8 years.

Either way, this beats the late 1990's, when Phillies ownership somehow tried to convince the media and baseball fans that they were a small market team. Apparently it was all part of a plan to suck for a few years, draft a bunch of homegrown studs, get a new stadium and be able to pay them all when the time comes. Kudos.

By the way, do you think those awful game-winning homers Brad Lidge gave up in the playoffs a couple years ago will come back to haunt him this year?

/ Lidge immediately gives up homer.

Dodgers (7-1)

Manny Ramirez has been absolutely killing the ball for them. You might have heard about it.

In other news, Chavez Ravine is apparently where former Braves stars go to die.

Cubs (5-1)

As I see it, the Cubs are the clear-cut best team in the National League. The regular season pretty much proved this as fact. There is no reason they shouldn't represent the NL in the World Series, except that the playoffs are a crapshoot and anything can happen in a five or seven game series. That being said, you got to love how this Cubs team is built for October. They have the deepest rotation of all the playoff teams, and Jason Marquis should be able to slide into a middle relief role for them, adding to an already deep bullpen.

This team led the NL in runs, doubles, OBP, SLG%, was 2nd in hits and average, 5th in homers. This all in spite of the fact that their best player missed 53 games this season. The Cubbies are stocked with talent, and quite frankly with no other horse in the race, I'm cheering for them to win it all (and shut everyone up about curses once and for all).

Angels (4-1)

This was an offense that really struggled before the acquisition of Mark Texiera at the deadline. However, upgrading from Casey Kotchman to Texiera is roughly the equivalent of upgrading from my dependable but POS '98 Toyota Corolla to a fully-loaded BMW E67, and since then, all is running smoothly in the land of the Rally Monkey. Regardless, I still get the feeling that this is still an offense with a tendency to fall asleep at times, and just two poor offensive showings in a row in the divisional series could be the end of the road for the Halos. Tough, tough first round draw for the team with the majors’ best record.

Won't be a problem this year, Barry.

Outside of John Lackey, the Angels rotation has little to none postseason experience. They better win the first two games of that series, because if they split 'em, they're looking at a Joe Saunders vs. Josh Beckett matchup in Game 3 in Boston. Just sayin'...

Red Sox (3-1)

I have a problem picking against the school of thought that "they've been there before, and they were the best." It's the kind of logic that made me pick the Yankees to win the World Series before every season from 1997-2006. It's the logic that allows me to continue selecting John Smoltz and Randy Johnson in fantasy every year. It's the logic that allows me to think that maybe Shaq isn't washed up. Anyway, I'm applying that logic here to the Sox...they're the champs, they have more postseason experience than anyone else in the playoffs, and they're still as stacked as any team out there.

I’m not sure I understand the weird dichotomy that while Manny was feasting on National League pitching and leading the Dodgers from a barely-sub .500 team to a barely-above .500 team, the Red Sox actually improved more so and played their best baseball without Manny. I don't think there is a correlation, but it seems there is still some doubt as to whether or not this lineup can still be lethal offensively in October with Jason Bay in there instead of Manny. And that may be because of the comfort zone they had with Manny, much like when a couple sticks together too long out of comfort even though they clearly want to break up.

Doesn't matter now...much like he did in trading Nomar Garciaparra in 2004, Theo Epstein decided he needed to take the risk and decided to cut ties with Manny in a controversial move. Rather than getting youngsters or a quick fix veteran, he grabbed a very good hitter in Bay that fits nicely into any lineup and is signed through next year at an extremely reasonable salary. He made the executive decision that it was over between the Sox and Manny and made the best of the situation...and thus far it has worked out.

Sure, Sox fans will long for Manny when Ortiz is getting intentionally walked so the pitcher can face Bay or Kevin Youkilis. But if the Sox don't win the World Series this year, it will likely be because their lineup couldn't withstand the loss injuries to J.D. Drew or Mike Lowell, or maybe because their middle relief is shaky as hell, or that they had to start freakin’ Tim Wakefield for a game. It won't be because their lineup is incapable of scoring runs with the personnel on the roster.

Not what Red Sox fans want to see this postseason.

Final Prediction: Red Sox over Cubs in 6. Place your bets.

Sobered Up - Week 4

First, check out BI's plea of "maybe we should just take a break and see what happens, but I still love you, baby!" to the Blackout era.

I was in Athens and I caught the replay (eh, certain parts I could stomach) last night. It was ugly. It was an ass-kicking. It reminded me of when Georgia was up-and-coming as a national power in 02-03 and would go on the road to Knoxville, Fayetteville, Tuscaloosa, etc. and just pound the living piss out of an overmatched opponent. That's what this was, only the Dawgs decided to play a little role reversal.

Regardless...there are some encouraging signs. While one who saw the score at halftime and postgame might be inclined to think the score didn't properly reflect the level Bama truly beat down on Georgia, I'll put on my Red and Black blinders and look at the following:

• Alabama outgained Georgia by only 10 yards (334-324).
• Most of Alabama's points came off of excellent field position they were given in the first half from dumb penalties and Brian Mimbs inexplicably forgetting how to punt a football like a Division 1 punter. These mistakes can hopefully be corrected.
• Despite the fact the Dawgs had to abandon their gameplan for pretty much the entire 2nd half and their best playmaker was limited to 12 touches, they were able to pull within two scores with a quarter remaining. This gives me alot of confidence in Stafford and the rest of the Dawgs ability to work from behind under a more reasonable deficit (maybe 10-17 points).
  
• An extraordinate amount of injuries to key contributors. The ball is definitely not bouncing our way on the injury front this year. Remember less than a year ago when we worried about having too many tight ends on our roster? Safe to say that problem won't be rearing its head again anytime soon.
  

I won't say anything about the defense, because I have spent the last 36 hours decompressing after this loss, and I don't want to think anymore about Akeem Dent perfecting a 15-yard bitch slap penalty or Willie Martinez employing the same zone scheme that allowed fucking JOHN PARKER WILSON to look like Tom Brady circa-2001 out there in the first half. I'll just leave it at 'the Dawgs have work to do, their strengths and weaknesses are pretty clear cut at this point, and they have two weeks to do fix what needs fixin.' They can still win the SEC and beyond. GATA, Richt and Co.

On the other end of the spectrum, USC's Thursday loss should NOT be compared to Georgia's. I don't wanna hear how at least they lost on the road...going to fuckin' Corvallis, Oregon on a Thursday should not instill fear and intimidation in the minds of USC's players that have been watched at a national level since high school. So anyways, it looks like USC's title hopes are done...

...or NOT. What the hell?!?! Are you kidding me? Watching both those games, they determined UGA was a lesser team than USC? They were so disgusted with UGA losing to the #8 (now #2) team in the nation that all of a sudden USC's inability to move the ball 48 hours earlier against a team that couldn't even stay on the field with Penn State didn't seem as bad?

Again, rankings at this point in the season really don't mean anything, and if Georgia wins out, I do think they'll be ranked higher than USC. That being said, I've had it with these idiotic pollsters. Let computers do it. I'm serious. Take a consensus of all the major computer polls and let them rank the teams using the criteria voters should be using. If college football isn't going to have a playoff, you may as well eliminate any bias that could fester when you involve human voters.

Memo to Urban Meyer...two years ago you could get away running Tebow up the middle on a 4th and 1 in the 4th quarter. You could for the majority of last season as well. Now? Everyone knows what's coming in that situation. It sucks for you that your highly touted RBs haven't panned out yet, but you're not fooling anyone anymore. And it's clearly taking a toll on your QB, who by the way, is 8-5 as a starter in his last 13 games.

This Arkansas team might be the worst non-Vandy SEC team I have ever seen. Petrino roaming the sidelines in Knoxville next year?

ECU, really, that was fun. At least your mini-run of relevance brought us the joy of watching North Carolina's finest putting tax dollars to good use...by bodyslamming inebriated 150-pound 19 year olds. Skip Holtz roaming the sidelines in Knoxville next year?

Speaking of Tennessee, this is going to end badly. We're at the point where a 14-12 loss to Auburn is a suprise...in a good way. Watching those two offenses was like watching a soft-core porn from the early 90s. Sure, it's still SEC football/naked women, but in the end, you're gonna leave disappointed and wholly unsatisfied.

Navy 24 Wake Forest 17. Maryland 20 Clemson 17. Another stellar weekend along the eastern seaboard.

And on that note, let's wrap up this really cheerful edition of Sobered Up with the Weekly Top 10:

1. Oklahoma
2. Alabama - 2 wins in the state of Georgia against Top 10 teams. One of those teams is actually good, too!
3. LSU - The Georgia/Florida SEC GAME OF THE CENTURY looks like it will now be played a week later. In Baton Rouge. And instead of Georgia and Florida, Alabama and LSU will be there.
4. Penn State
5. Texas
6. Missouri
7. Georgia
8. South Florida
9. USC
10. Texas Tech...this...this is tough. Their most impressive win thus far is a 35-19 win at Nevada. Let's just say this is a tentative ranking right now.

And in honor of Blutarsky's Mumme Poll, we'll go ahead and round out the Top 12 with Florida and BYU. Though for the quality of the game's sake, I'm glad to see Ohio State have Beanie Wells back. This looks to be another wild season in the College Football world...but after this one, I'll be glad to take a break this upcoming weekend.

Fade to Black

My new least-favorite Stafford-spooning pic.

Bourn Inferiority here:

I will try my absolute best here to make this post strictly about the
Georgia game in relation to the Blackout, rather than an epitaph of
the 2008 Georgia Football Season. Please keep in mind I merely said
try.

When the losses come, they always seem to hit hard when they matter
most. In Jacksonville 2003, my cell phone got destroyed after a
stumble into the Landing's fountain, my favorite hat got stolen, my
second favorite hat flew out the window on the way to the game, and we
lost. This weekend very much reminded me of that little doozy, with
1/2 of my car, a brand new digital camera, about a half million of my
favorite brain cells and my cell phone were all casualties alongside
the dawgs. Sheesh. These types take a while to get over.

Doesn't it suck when you have a semi-permanent reminder of a really
bad loss, until you at least spend a few hundred dollars getting your
car fixed so you once again have a side view mirror and at least one
side that's not demolished? Of course, the loss didn't cause my cell
phone to get destroyed, the digital camera to be fritzed, or my car to
get roughed up. But that is factually and patently irrelevant. Is my
soul crushed to pieces because of this loss? Of course. Do I feel like
my boyish football hopes for this season just got gang raped by 12
angry, large men? I do indeed. Is all of this compounded and
multiplied because of the additional calamitous events of the weekend?
Certainly. But was the Georgia loss the root cause of my other series
of unfortunate events?

In the same logic, we'll look to Dawg Gone Blog to comment on this
Dawg Gone Game. In an effort to sum up this depressing nut crunching loss, we're provided a quick nugget of wisdom:

"2) Losing the Blackout -- I'm a fan of the Blackout. It gets theplayers excited, gets the fans excited and gets the recruits excited. I don't think it's "gimmicky" at all. I also don't think the blackjerseys cost us a game. I'm absolutely amazed by the folks on themessage boards who think the Blackout should never come around ever again. We didn't lose the game because we were too worried about our wardrobe. We lost the game because we got punched in the mouth and didn't respond. That being said, I do think it's time to take the stance of making the players EARN the Blackout instead of just setting a date for it. Last year it was a reward; this year it was a certainty. I say keep the Blackout, but let's hang it up for just a little while until I get this taste of "embarrassment" out of my mouth."

Y'know, I couldn't have said it better myself. I really couldn't. I
love the Blackout. Love it. It only marginally adds to my enjoyment of
the game, because the pageantry and tradition and campus viewings on
game day are what really gets my heart pumping. But it does add to it,
if only because it provides an extra dimension to the weekend. I think
it clearly reveals the abundant amount of support the fans have for
these Dawgs, but it gets the players fired up and hey, whatever works.
Seeing all of the fans - not just the students, where black shows me
that Dawg Nation LOVES to love their Bulldogs, a far cry from only 8
years ago when we expected to be let down year after year, winning our
glass ceiling 8 games even with incredible talent and always falling
short in the big games. Now it's different. Now we expect to win, and
I hope Dawg fans keep that in mind.

The black jerseys are cool. They just look cool. I think it even makes
us look more ferocious, although admittedly looks were deceiving
Saturday night. And the women were (as always) spectacular in their
Saturday best black dresses. Why would you want to do away with
something that provides so much entertainment? I'm down for putting
the jerseys away for a year, maybe two, but no more than that. I
wouldn't even care if they busted them out again this year, although
my preference would be to wait a little while.

So let's layoff blaming this loss on the Blackout, okay guys? It was
just as much their fault as the fact I didn't have my Musa Smith
jersey for the first time in 6 years. So if you're going to blame it
on any apparel decision, blame it on me.

Shotcallin' - Week 5 (Sergeant Joe Friday edition)

Just the picks, ma'am. Wegots to get on the road for a Blackout!

Texas (-27.5) over Arkansas - $20

East Carolina (-11.5) over Houston - $10

Auburn (-7) over Tennessee - $10

UAB (+26.5) over South Carolina - $25

SC/UAB (UNDER 48.5) - $50

Troy State (+17.5) over Oklahoma State - $20

Georgia (-6.5) over Alabama - $20

Illinois/Penn St. (OVER 54.5) - $10

Last Week: 6-4

2008 Record: 20-13

2008 Pot: $160

USCall It an Upset

Correction. USC DOES suck.

USC'moon Already

Fellow SEC Snob

Alright now in all honesty, they don't suck. They're an incredibly solid team that reloads quicker than Neo (fun fact! he never reloads, he just pulls out more guns!) with seemingly better, stronger and quicker talent every year. Carson Palmer. Reggie Bush. I mean they're fucking good okay?

But how many of those BCS Championship games would they have taken part in if they were in the SEC, or even the Big 12? I ask because I am currently watching the 4th quarter of yet another inevitable comeback by USC on a Thursday night against a terrible, terrible team. And as our now-buddy from Arizona State aptly puts it directly above, in that respect USC just plain sucks.

How do you do it USC? How do you maintain such an elevated (inflated?) sense of accomplishment and sense of self year after year when you play against, and in several cases barely beat, patsies? Yes, you will probably win this game before I am done bitching about this, but that's not the point. I am so tired of watching you fall behind and play close games against inferior opponents, needing blocked kicks (play-by-play!) and the like just to eek out a victory. I'm tired of everyone heralding you as the best in the country when you have to keep relying on your athleticism and superior conditioning to come back against not just weak, but mind-blowingly weak ass teams. If these teams weren't tired from beating your pretty boy ass in the first half, they would be able to maintain these Vics.

You're a great team USC. You're the Trojans. By your namesake you should be covering, especially against skeezy and suspect people. Start doing it already.

Damn Good Dawg

So long Larry...for my money, the best play-by-play AND color guy in the business. Listening to Munson really made you feel like you were watching the game.

Personal anecdote: The highest compliment regarding Munson I can think of came from a buddy of mine...this guy is basically a hater. "This bar sucks. She's not my type. I don't like this song. That show is gay." Fun guy to hang around. Anyway, he also hates UGA and College Football.

One day, Arkansas '05, we were driving back from a round of golf when I put on the Georgia game. The hater was hooked by Munson. "Who is this announcer?" he asked. The whole 45 minute drive back to Atlanta, a guy that had no interest in the game, who never watches a second of Georgia football, listened in silence to Munson call the game. Said it sounded like he was being told an enjoyable story involving football, and was better than actually watching the game.

The Braves Big Four (Carey, Van Weiren, Sutton, and Simpson) were great. Munson was the best.

Sobered Up: Week Four

Well, well, well. Here we are, and Week Four is over already. Weren't we just picking Clemson to get their asses handed to them by Alabama a few weeks ago? On a sad note, this means we're now officially 1/3 of the way through the regular season of 2008. It's really quite deflating if you think about it too long.

We're going to save the in depth opining for later today, but for now let's throw up our Top Ten:

1. USC - How many byes do these guys have? And why so early, USC?
2. Georgia - If you're a Bulldog you have to be feeling pretty good right now. While a few of the teams on this year's monstrous schedule have turned out to be considerably less competitive than previously assumed (here's looking at you, Tennessee and 'Zona State), only Georgia Tech seems to be much better than the Dawg nation pegged them to be. It seems they chose the perfect option with their new coach. Oh, and if you're one of the fans that have been watching AJ Green's YouTube highlights for the past year, foaming at the mouth for a deep threat to materialize, isn't it great when accomplishment parallels potential? Even for one game?
3. Oklahoma - Could easily be in the number two slot, but Georgia's win over Zona State was convincing enough for them to move in. In any case, Georgia beats Alabama convincingly this weekend for the 2nd Annual Blackout game, and Georgia is the clear cut number two, perhaps even number one.
4. Florida - Beat an outclassed opponent, but a road win in the SEC should never be taken lightly, especially at Neyland Stadium.
5. LSU - I love the SEC. A real close game against stacked-with-talent LSU should allow Auburn to work their way back into the Top 15 by the time Georgia plays them.
6. Texas - Texas, you're going to have to start playing some real teams soon.
7. Alabama - As is the case with every game every week, this Saturday is the biggest game of the season. It should be a real slobberknocker.
8. Missouri - Sue is a big fan of holding on acclaim until teams or individuals play worthy opponents, but Chase Daniel proved his mettle last year. This kid's good.
9. South Florida
10. Texas Tech - I really hope Texas Tech wins the few tough games they have this year. Prolific offenses are so fun to watch in late December

JJ here...just a couple of rambling additional thoughts off the top of my head...

Boy, it didn't take long for the Bill Stewart era to turn sour in a hurry. So you're telling me it's actually a bad idea to hand your program over to a guy that couldn't win at VMI? Interesting. I think Pat White and Co. may have killed the whole "talented veteran team strongarms school into picking lovable assistant coach to promote" idea for a little while.

I'm still not impressed with LSU's QB situation at all, and it will cost them down the line. Fortunately, outside of the QB position, they are still on par with USC in terms of talent. Also, I think it's safe to say that you can pencil in any and all LSU/Auburn games into the ESPN Classic rotation from here on out.

What the hell is it with "big" ACC games and field goals? Did that Wake-FSU game remind anyone else of this epic battle?

I love the SEC and everything, but Vandy is not a Top 25 team. They had half the yardage of Ole Miss on Saturday. The Commodores being ranked shows the utter uselessness of Top 25 polls, espicially this early in the season. That said, I will be happy to see them play in a bowl this year.

Georgia Tech's offense looks really, really good. And Paul Johnson is a hardass. That halftime interview where he said two sentences about how crappy his team played before running away from the reporter in disgust was oddly entertaining. His team was up 28-0 at the time, by the way.

Between UCLA's stomping at the hands of BYU and Arizona and Saturday's massacre in Knoxville....this Tennessee team looks like the worst edition of my lifetime. However, I have full confidence in Phil Fulmer to back into keeping his job, somehow.

Wake me up when someone in the Big 12 plays someone decent.

Enjoy the week, kiddos....more later.

Stuff White People Like: Writing About Race and/or America

I really wasn't going to comment on the whole Josh Howard-YouTube "controversy." To me, it really wasn't that big of a deal. I saw the situation as is, and quite frankly, it played out extremely predictably:

• Josh Howard, in a charity flag football game, made some off-hand remarks during the national anthem about "how he don't celebrate that shit," because he's black and muttered something about Obama. (Note: I am paraphrasing, as the video has since been removed from YouTube)
• Old, white, stodgy media types react with disgust and horror, and the story gets national attention.
  
• White liberal hipster bloggers (how's that for redundancy?), some of whose reading I thoroughly enjoy, take to the other extreme, expressing predictable outrage at White America in full support of Howard's thoughtless comments. Stuff White People Like could not have written this part of the situation more perfectly.
  

Since nobody asked, here is my stance on this story: It isn't one.

I consider myself a patriotic American. I love this country, I think it is the best country in the world, and I would like to see it remain that way. I have my political views, and I do my damnedest not to discuss them in public forums, or with strangers, because, really, what good has ever come of that? I recognize the utter non-necessity that is the National Anthem prior to sporting events, and yet, I still enjoy it and honor the flag.

That being said, I have no problem with Howard's comments. Were they stupid? Yeah...anyone with a modicum of fame should realize they shouldn't EVER say anything like that in front of a rolling camera unless they want controversy to follow. But were they disrespectful? Not really.

He made some off-the-cuff remarks around his boys. Ever been there, media types and hipster bloggers? You're talking about what illegal-in-Utah things you would do to the blond co-ed across the bar? You just let loose and drop a *B* or *C* bomb in reference to your girlfriend or boss? Ever tell off-colored jokes before? (If your answer is no, you are either a fucking liar or an enormous pussy) That's how I viewed these Howard comments. Saying something stupid he probably didn't mean in front of his boys. No harm, no foul.

While Howard has certainly been one to SPEAK THE TRUTH before, I don't see this as some massive political statement. He has always stood for the national anthem before Mavs games, and if you don't think he will on October 30th, well I've got a bridge in eastern Cuba you might be interested in.

So, use this as ammo against "anti-American" Josh Howard or White America if you must. Throw around hyperbolic terms such as"unpatriotic," "thug," "High-Tech Lynching" and use this minor story as a springboard to make blanket statements that "America is a racist country" and accuse John McCain of releasing racist ads. Or for once, feel free to take the high road and ignore this non-story, because Mark Cuban and Josh Howard seem to be the only ones doing that right now.

(Addendum: I wish the focus had been more on this doozy. Uptight NBA staffers, smoking in a hotel room, local girls, apparent flushing-of-herb, and B-Easy refusing to rat out his buddies. Reminds me of many a similar trip to fraternity national conventions or leadership symposiums, all of which made for excellent stories down the road. Of course at the rate we're going, the focus would have been all on "out-of-control NBA young'uns" or "why wasn't Kevin Love's room searched?")

Shotcallin' - Week 4

Quick thoughts on this weekend's games and the picks for Week 4...Enjoy:


Georgia -7 over Arizona State - $20

I wish I was there. The game is reason #1. Reason #2 pictured above. This is reason #3.

(Note: Reasons may not be in any particular order)

I never understood the whole "UGA can't take the HEAT in the desert!!!111" meme. Has anyone who bought into that actually spent time in either the southwest or the deep south? I agree with Westerdawg: Give me 100+ degree days in dry heat over that sweaty-swampass-inducing sticky heat we have down here. Gatorade, water, and those giant mist fans will keep the Dawgs cool in Tempe. It's not like they're from fucking Buffalo or anything.

Aaaah...Mist Fans...is there anything they can't do?

Get all your game previewin' on at Hey Jenny Slater, Dawg Gone Blawg, and Dawg Sports.

LSU -2.5 over Auburn - $15
LSU/Auburn UNDER 37.5 - $15

I am thoroughly intrigued by this game. The offenses should be cringeworthy at best, but the quality, speed and talent on the defensive sides of the ball will be enough to give anyone who enjoys REAL SEC FOOTBALL a boner by halftime.

That being said, I see both defenses spending a disproportionate amount of time on the field, and thus, tiring late in the 3rd or early in the 4th quarter. While LSU's QB play to this point worries me, I have just a bit more faith in their offensive braintrust than Auburn's legendary little league system.

Florida -7.5 over Tennessee - $15

You will see me downing shots of Red Snapper while wearing a pink tutu and singing "Rocky Top" at the top of my lungs before you ever see me bet on Phil Fulmer vs. Urban Meyer.

Missy State +7.5 over Georgia Tech - $15
MSU/GT UNDER 36.5 - $15

Just like Auburn/LSU....only with 75% less talent and even FEWER offensive playmakers (yes, that is somehow possible)!

Troy State + 20.5 over Ohio State - $10

I'm a sucker for the "Troy State to cover a huge line against a BCS opponent" bet. What can I say? Add in the fact that Skullcap Wells is still out and Todd Boeckman SOMEHOW IS STILL GOING TO PLAY (!?!?!?!!?) and I gotta roll with the Condoms on this one.

NC State + 7 over East Carolina - $10

ECU falling back to earth in 5...4...3...2...

Mizzou - 34 over Buffalo - $10

Really, though, the precision and perfection that which Mizzou is able to apply while completely demolishing some of the worst teams in Division 1-A and 1-AA is truly impressive. I mean, they're clearly doing a great job of impressing some of the biggest idiots with a forum to write about college football.

Seriously. Go click that link. That asshat has two Mizzou players in his Top 5 Heisman ballot thus far. He has Tim Tebow, who's had one good game against Hawaii and one medicore one against Miami, at #3. He has Knowshon Moreno, he of 7 touchdowns almost 7 yards per carry...FALLING OFF HIS TOP 10 after single-handedly keeping Georgia in the game against a team better than anyone Mizzou or Florida has played. I hate bitching about media bias against UGA, and I don't think this guy has it out for the Dawgs, but jeezus...I'd feel better if Plaschke had a Heisman vote over that guy.

Texas - 29 over Rice - $10

Leaving Work Right Now > Saying Anything About This Game

Last Week: 3-4

2008 Record: 14-9

2008 Pot: $135