When Does Bret Boone Get His Trophy?

In an attempt to pen the most worthless article in the history of ESPN the Mag (quite a feat, indeed), Rick Reilly decides to take back all MVPs awarded to "suspected steroid users" and place them in the hands of "their rightful owners."

For instance, he takes the 2001 MVP away from Barry Bonds, who, with or without steroids, an all time great that by every statistical measure was the best player in '01 (when you know, 75% of the damn league was juicing) and gives it to...Luis. Gonzalez.

The same Luis Gonzalez that averaged 12 homers a season over the first seven years of his MLB career before putting up the following homerun totals in the years prior to steroid testing becoming commonplace:

1998- 23
1999- 26
2000- 31
2001- 57 (his "MVP" season)
2002- 28
2003- 26

Notriously scrappy, all-natural hustle guys like Moises Alou, Mike Piazza, Albert Pujols and Carlos Delgado also pick up this shiny, brand-new, make-believe hardware. Thank you Rick Reilly, for expunging the sacred MVP award of any steroid suspicion whatsoever.