S-E-C! S-E-C! S-E-C!

"She made brussel sprouts last night. They were surprisingly tender."

You're getting a sporadic liveblog of today's SEC Championship for no reason other than to get yesterday's abortion of a post off the top of this here page.

4:53pm- Alabama is leading 10-7 thanks to a great after-the-catch run from Julio Jones to set up a Glen Coffee teedee. I seriously can't remember the last time Florida was losing during a game. It might be possible Georgia lead them 3-0 or something, but I have effectively blocked that weekend and game out of my mind.

4:56- It ain't exactly time for Bammer fans to exhale yet, but JPW looks remarkably efficient thus far...3-4 for 79 yards, a tough run under pressure for a first down, and throwing the ball away when he needs to. Basically he's playing like he did against Georgia.

5:00- I was surprised how congenial my drunken conversations were last nite with Alabama and Florida fans, though I got to admit I am a bit perplexed with the looks of pity they gave me upon learning I was a Georgia fan. It was the same sympathetic look I would give someone who said they were a diehard Mississippi State fan. Luckily we were all able to bond over how great the SEC is.

5:03- Bama brings in a second string kicker...to run a fake field goal? What the hell? That was straight out the Les Miles playbook...if Miles had a retarted younger brother. Not sure what Saban was thinking there

5:05- In those ads for upcoming guests on Letterman/Leno, is the footage of "this week's guests" from old episodes? I've always wondered that but just assumed...

5:09- Tebow completes a long bomb to Riley Cooper to get inside Alabama's 10. The difference in breakaway speed between Percy Harvin and Florida's other receivers is quite noticible. Kinda like the difference between Pizza Hut, Papa Johns and fuckin' Dominos, whos pizza is really just dry bread, stale marinara and the occasional sploch of cheese. Their pizzas always have those enormous air bubbles that offer no flavor or enhance the pizza enjoyment process. Anyone who willingly orders a pie from Dominos is insane.

5:15- Florida ties it up at 10 with a field goal. Is it just me or does Florida go to Tebow juuuuuust a little too much near the goal line? I mean, I get that it works alot, but everyone...the other team, fans, coaches, announcers know its coming. Against good defenses, like Bama's, it's not nearly as effective it seems.

5:16- Saban and Meyer are both friends with Bill Belichick. No shit. Personality must be oozing from the room when those three get together.

5:21- Mmmmm...first post-hangover bong rip.

5:27- After Tebow gets stuffed twice inside the 10, he connects with David Nelson for a TD as a Bama safety just stands there. That was fun. We might hit the over by halftime.

5:29- Kinda pissed I didn't bet on UCLA to cover the 33.5. USC is definitely due for an underwhelming performance against a crappy Pac-10 team. It's been over two months.

5:36- Looks like Florida will head into halftime with a 17-10 lead. They're hitting JPW alot now and are containing their rushing attack as well....momentum is on their side right now....great. I'm so sick of seeing these fuckers win. Rammer Jammer (or whatever that is) for the next 30 minutes.

5:40- Oh sweet, its the Dr. Pepper championship day games. Two girls are throwing footballs into giant cans of Dr. Pepper with holes. One of the announcers comments "it's not necessary to try and throw a spiral since they're only 5-10 yards out." Umm, methinks that won't be a problem, yo.

5:43- By the way, last night's Hawks game made me extremely wary of this impending Dallas-SanAntonio-Houston trip. When the 3s ain't falling, that team has a tendency to look like an overmatched college team that just sits around chucking 3s for 40 minutes. Drew from Zaza's Playground points out that when the 3s aren't falling, dishing it inside to Big Al (or Smith if he feels like venturing down there on O) is a solid option. Beats the hell out of just isolating Joe and letting him do his thing (I swear last night I thought this was happening again). But whatever, I'm going to enjoy the hell out of this 12-6 record. It's fun to "read" the NBA Standings once again.

6:03- DAMN. What a weird interview with Saban before the second half. Dude seems livid/confused/frustrated regarding that fake kick debacle. Apparantly their kicker was poked in the eye and unable to kick. Makes sense...that call wasn't Saban-esque at all.

6:13- I will be very, very pleased if Georgia's offensive line resembles Alabama's in 2-3 years.

6:15- awwww, Wilson just overthrew Julio Jones in the endzone after having enough time in the backfield to make a sandwich and drink a beer. Burn that clock, Bama. Keep that Gators offense on the sideline.

6:20- With Jones and Glen Coffee visibly tired and on 2nd and 10, Meyer has to burn a timeout. Tough break for the Gators.

6:22- Two plays later, Bama punches it in. That O-Line just put on a clinic during this drive.

6:30- Florida can't capitalize on quick work by Tebow and Co. as Jonathan Phillips misses a field goal. I agree with Urban Meyer: I don't like field goals.

6:38- I was about to type that UF's defense looks ragged and tired, then they promptly knock Wilson down and force him to throw it away on third down. Field goal style.

6:42- A better live blog.

6:45- Ugh....just saw a bunch of groupshots of fat/drunk Florida and Bama fans. I think I'll stay away from Buckhead/Midtown tonight.

6:52- Florida inside Alabama's 5. Tebow time.

6:53- After one stuff on Tebow, Florida runs an option pitch to Jeff Demps for the easy TD. I ain't gonna lie...when executed perfectly, there ain't a more exciting play out there. Other than the David Greene special.

7:00- BLUE!

And once you begin delving into the YouTube portion of a liveblog, you know you got nothing left. I'm going to go watch the end of this SECgasm. Thank you for your time.